after last night im slowly realizing

my god im really really shit, i mean i got EXTREMELY lucky cashed out 4th after a pathetic push.

its funny i said to mrj on msn i really dont think i could win this and he said “you can”.

im ranting at myself so forgive me,

i cant believe what a crap week i have had i mean poker aside im hitting brick walls where ever i go,

our lass isnt feeling to great this week im trying to help her over her deppresion she wont go to a doctor so it makes it a little tough i feel that i can do nothing right, then again show me a man that can in a womans eye!

the kids are great tho they loving the time im off we are struggling thru potty training!! and getting the kids not to throw paddys on jorneys out i mean if there was oscars for thier tantrums WOW my kids would win it out right everytime, i luagh our lass gets pissed off people stare i just luagh and everyone thinks im evil as i have no problem with just walkin off a little and waiting for the kids to realise i aint gonna moddle coddle them, they pick themselfs up and run after me and we r good again (god im a evil dad)

it does slightly wind me up when we r in town n they have a paddy i mean dont get me wrong it they can kick scream shout whatever i just luagh but when people stop and stare it annoys me. didnt thier kids ever have a paddy? oh wait no its coz i cant control them surely or is it the way our lass looks pissed off…..

they r bloody hilariuos my kids they fight over the dumbest things it has me in stiches and if i go n make a cup of tea JESUS came bk in the room yesterday my loverly dfs leather sofas covered with felt tip and the kids looked like art attack had done a number on them they stood there grinning our lass turned blue!! “why didnt u watch them” she said “fuck sake gary its gonna take ages to get that out” now me i have a diffrent attitude so the kids with baby wipes attempted to clean it off, whilst i went and got the leather cleaner…SORTED.

lol so back to poker yes im in a bad way at the min u know what last ight i did so well then lost it.

now im trying to get thru the levels and need points so sat wit mj and cia at a table and played well to be fair got up in my game then it came LIKE A FLASH OF LIGHTENING THE BRICK WALL, loss loss loss.

in the space of a hour i lost $100 im so ashamed what does gaz do?

play more agrressive get wrked up and then fail as usual.

un fucking real i mean im my own worst enemy i really am im in for a few GAZ WHAT THE FUCKS today i know that but i can only say I TILTED BIG,

so im bk to shit i have to try again and re build but how? how the fuck can i come bk from that shite last night i dunno i think a re load.

lukethedrifter said to me “gaz when you re load (the other week) go to the s&g $1 games and slowly re build. i have now got $29 in my account so i think im going to do just that i have a mtt ant 8pm tonight so i think im in that and then stt for the remainder